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We have literally received hundreds of messages and e-mails from around the world offering support and understanding about the letter we wrote in regards to HJR-3, the gay ban on marriage, in Indiana.  Tons of couples, just like ourselves, have offered their stories as a sign of camaraderie, and we have felt the support through their numerous stories, friend requests on Facebook, follows on Twitter and in small ways, which have helped us realize that with one step at a time we can change the direction of our country.  We even received an email from my father who stated, “Pete; I shared your blog post with our attorney and legislative liaison.  She was so impressed she forwarded it to a lobbyist who is working against the bill.  See one person can make a difference.” 

Probably one of the most profound messages we’ve received is from the mother of a 7 year old boy who attached a picture of him holding up a sign that simply stated, “I Support You”.  But the most overwhelming responses we have received have been from heterosexual Christians who have told us, over and over again, that we have changed their perspective on gay marriage, simply by reading the letter. 

Several days ago, we received a lengthy letter from a young girl who identified herself as “straight, Catholic, 18 year old, college girl”.  The letter was so heartfelt and so wise above it’s years that we insisted on posting it, realizing that our youth are really the ones driving the future of our country.  We had asked for people to share their stories with us and so we’re going to share her story with you! We hope you enjoy it as much as we did.

Dear Peter,

In regards to your letter to your friend, Annie, I salute you for your honesty, but I also apologize for the fact that our state has forgotten the constitutional properties in which our country was founded. “Separation of church and state” is a tried and true statement and I’m not sure what has changed that has kept this from ringing true.

I am a straight, Catholic, 18 year old college girl. From first glance, it would not appear that we have much in common other than the fact that the media seems to think we are premium ”bff” material, but I think our similarities go deeper than that.  Parts of who we are have been mangled into these massive stereotypes neither of us wanted. In my opinion, that should be illegal before a law that prohibits someone’s emotional security.

I may be Catholic, but I don’t see it to be my duty to preach a belief set that makes others feel inadequate or to accuse people different than me as being sinners. I’ve gone to mass every Sunday since I was born and have never been told that being nasty and judgmental are Christian qualities. I’m not the final judge in any of this, but I have a very hard time believing the people yelling homosexual slurs at you and your partner are closer to Heaven than people like me who pass no judgment. I’m not gay, so of course I don’t understand how someone could be attracted to someone of the same sex. You have a male partner so you probably have a hard time imagining the attractive qualities of heterosexual relationship. I feel like this gray area is a normal thing. I feel like its okay that I don’t completely understand. I can’t knock something I don’t know, so I won’t. I don’t know how God feels about it, but frankly no one knows how God feels about anything. I could quote the bible as many do and say that that is why homosexual relationships are bad, but that doesn’t explain why they are illegal in the state of Indiana.

In my personal belief set, I feel abortion is bad, but that is legal. However, many other people think abortion is fine and the procedure happens every day. I don’t judge those women or the doctors that perform those procedures because, again, my opinion makes no impact on where they spend their afterlife. If I thought gay marriage is a harmful act, which I don’t, I could use the same argument, except, as you obviously know, the difference is that it is illegal.  This seems backwards to me. Abortion and gay marriage are obviously very different things, but they are both things Catholics and many other Christian groups like to oppose and only one is legal.  Last I checked, the government is not a Christian entity. I chose to be Catholic on my confirmation day. I made a choice, as did you when you formed your own belief set. What I don’t understand is why the government thinks they can make one of the most fundamental choices for you, and drag my religion and your sexual orientation through the mud with them? Frankly, the government and media make my precious religious beliefs out to be a storm of judgmental extremists and people of your sexual orientation out to be a bunch of flamboyant rebellions. It sickens me that they still have this power when the Pope himself refuses to pass judgment upon people like you and your partner and where “going against the system” when used with homosexuals can somehow mean “wanting the same rights the system already has.”

If this is published or a large group of people get to read this letter, I’m sure it will be criticized, but I’m okay with that.  In regards to your original letter, I’m glad the world has matured enough to only verbally insult you and your partner occasionally. Obviously, it is not ideal and I’m sorry there are still people like that in our world, but hopefully, this letter can be treated with the same “kindness” if it is read. The main reason I wrote this to you is so you know that the majority is not what you see on television. My religion is not the unforgiving blockade it is made out to be. Generally, it is composed of tolerant and mature individuals, like you and your partner seem to be.  I truly hope that you and your partner can someday have the legal luxuries heterosexual couples have. Just because I don’t understand all aspects of homosexuality doesn’t make me anymore ignorant than it makes the practice itself “bad”. People fear what they don’t know, but I don’t think fear is a valid excuse for manipulating the constitution. People make choices and decide what they believe. With that being said, I don’t think everyone has to think your sexual orientation is okay, but that shouldn’t constitute for a law to be written to decide for you either. I hope that you and your partner find security in your relationship, regardless of whether or not the state provides it for you. Indiana needs more producing and caring citizens like you and your partner, so I hope this doesn’t drive you away. I promise not to judge you because I know that media and government intentions make things skewed and I hope you grant my religion and I the same courtesy.

So here’s to things getting better. I think we are all good people at heart. I’m hoping someday the world decides to advertise that instead of the rigid stereotypes of today. We obviously all need a reality check.

Yours truly,

Rebecca

Much love! Please share your story and continue to contact us! We love it! We would also love if you would share this and keep the discussion going!

Peter can be contacted directly at peter@raannt.com and found on Facebook and Twitter

Alex can be contacted directly at alex@raannt.com and found on Facebook and Twitter

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